No, I don’t really think they exist. But if you were in downtown Silver Spring October 22, 2011 than they were real for one night. Silver Spring had it’s annual zombie walk where people from all walks of life dressed up as zombies and walked all across the downtown area.
In fact, if you didnt feel like dressing up as a zombie you could go as a spectator ( take pictures of the zombies) or go as a zombie hunter and hunt down all the zombies with fake swords and Nerf guns.
When I lathered on globs of cream colored paste on my skin, fake blood down my shirt and red makeup over my face; I pondered what misadventures I could get into that night. Little did I know, would the following happen:
1.) Every minute I screached, “Brains, brains, I need Matt Damons brains.” I did it enough where onlookers would give me a quizzical expression and where some fellow zombies scratched their heads. I mean seriously, why Matt Damon. I was like, Why not Matt Damon?
2.) I grabbed a gumball in the shape of an eye-ball, spotted a young 9-year-old zombie hunter and threw the gumball at him. Then ran away swiftly, before he prodded and stabbed his weapon at me. Zombies get one point, zombie hunters get zero points.
3.) I was about to throw another gumball at the direction of these three Silver Springers who dressed up as zombie hunters from “Resident Evil”, but ran away before the thought pervaded my brain. Those Silver Springers looked exactly like they were from Resident Evil and I wanted to live past 2011, atleast, without getting creamed by real zombie hunters. Zombies hunters get 1 point, while zombie are still okay with 1 point.
4.) I found a zombie hunter with frizzy hair, an undulated sword and a confused expression on her face. I tossed the gumball at her direction and she swiftly used her sword to hit it away. My face fell. I screamed and ran across to McGinty’s… Zombie hunter gets 1 point and Zombie loses 1 point for being a coward. 😦
5.) The walk may have ended by this time but me pretending to be a zombie never ended. As I was driving out the parking garage, I lowered all the windows and told all my friends to scream, ” Brains, Brains I need Matt Damon’s brains” at anyone they could find. So far, 25% of the people who saw us waved to us while a majority of the rest gave us dirty looks.
6.) Finally, I see this girl with a lopsided pony tail slowly drive past me. I got the strongest impression from her that she had no idea about the zombie festival that just occurred. So, I lowered all my car windows, stuck both my oscillating arms out and screamed, ” Brains, Brains, I want your brains.” The girl with the uneven hairstyle screamed, ” Oh sh*%” and swerved her car to the far right-hand side. As a fellow zombie of Silver Spring that night, I felt like that was a success story. Zombie’s reclaim a point after losing a point from McGinty’s awhile back.